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Dan and Jillian came to see Dawna eighteen months after Dan's brief affair had ended. They'd seen a family counselor at the time and they'd done everything right: full disclosure, individual as well as couples counseling, and a recommitment ceremony with their parish priest. Jillian said all the right words, too: "I've forgiven him. We've moved past it." But after a few sessions, a pattern became clear. Whenever Dan was late coming home, or vague about a work trip, Jillian's

Many years ago, when Dawna was in graduate school we were approached by another couple slightly older than us, Amy and Greg, whom Mark knew from his work. They invited us to engage in what they called "marital co-counseling." The idea was simple: Mark would meet weekly with Amy, and talk with her about any issues that he had in his relationship to Dawna. Amy would offer a "woman's perspective" and help him strategize ways to fix the problem. Then they would switch roles, and

How well do you treat your spouse? Do you treat them as they deserve? Do you find yourself in tit-for-tat interactions? Are many, maybe even most of your actions responses to their words and deeds? Or do you treat your spouse as God would have you treat them, regardless of whether you feel they deserve it? In this Sunday's Gospel, Jesus tells his disciples that the Son of Man will repay each according to his conduct, and that whoever loses his life for his sake will find it.